Saturday, May 28, 2011

I am not 20something anymore...

These are words to live by, or rather words to stay alive by.

I planned on getting drunk last night. I did not plan on being barfing drunk by 1AM though. Actually it was earlier than that. I gave up and taxied home at 1AM. This was a real shitshow in my mind. I hope it didn't look as bad from the outside. The whole problem revolves around trying to keep up with a 21 year old. Drinking Fireball Whiskey has never been a problem but the quantities and timing last night were a bit accelerated for me I think.

The evening started at a friend’s place. He has graciously hosted many a pre-party and has included me often which is very kind of him given we really don’t know each other all that well. There are always interesting people there and I generally just hang out and take in all the conversation. I did realize after the last one that I let my habit of being a quiet observer overshadow the fact that I was at a party and should be participating more. I think I was better last night. That is before the liquor kicked in, which was thankfully after leaving the party. We went to The Mansion and then to The Renaissance. Yes I puked in two different establishments last night. A personal record for me, thank you very much.

My intention was to blame this all on Colin. However, as the evening started with a hug from him when I got to the party and ended with a hug as he sent me to my taxi, as well as the fact that he is babysitting me from afar tonight I will let him off the hook. I will however not let him mix my drinks next time.

That is all. I am now going to watch a Julia Roberts chick flick and drown my loneliness in Haggen Daz. Cheaper than Therapy.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Does this outfit make me look fat?

The question no man ever wants to hear.  Truth is there are many questions we don't ever want to answer honestly.  If you think about it there are many questions, asked or unasked, that we don’t want the honest answer to as well.

As friends, we want to be supportive.  From our friends we want the same.  If we are contemplating an unwise purchase we might want our friends to be honest if they think it's a bad idea.  If we have made up our mind or have already made the purchase we want friends to agree with us that it was an awesome buy.  Stronger than that as the friend in the former scenario we are compelled to be supportive.  After all, the damage is done.  What will honesty serve now?  Who wants to say “I told you so” anyway?

Scenario number two: Your friend tells you the guy you are dating (or girl in the case of people who date girls) is not right for you, nasty, gross, smelly, too rich, too poor, too educated, uneducated or for whatever reason inappropriate.  You are pretty likely to dismiss this opinion, after all, you know yourself better.  Depending on your friend’s conviction you may well estrange yourself from them.  Why would you want an unsupportive friend?

Sometimes I think I am a bad friend.  I haven’t told anyone their boyfriend was a jerk.  I didn’t tell someone they were being unreasonable when they clearly thought they were not and I clearly thought they were.  I may have told someone that colour doesn’t suit them while it was on the rack but held my tongue when it was in the bag.  I just want everyone to be happy and I seem to think agreeing with someone makes them happy.  In the short term it probably does.  In the long term; you might be looking at a huge bite in the ass.

So I have not answered any deep, philosophical question here.  I still don’t know what the answer is.  Honesty is important and I think most of us strive for that.  On a friendship level can we be brutally honest and still have friends?  I’m not sure we could.  It is a social experiment I don’t think I could try given the risk.

PS: Does this outfit make me look fat?

Monday, May 16, 2011

Challenges, Easy and Improbable

I have put forth my 30 Day Challenge to become active in June but I have not posted about the 10 Day Challenge I just completed.  A challenge that probably makes June all the more necessary.  I fell into this challenge by accident.  Starbucks recently ran a promotion; Frapuccino Happy Hour.  More affectionately known, to me, as Frappy Hour.  Half price Frappuccinos every day between the hours of 3:00PM to 5:00PM.  Before I knew it I had been there the first three days of the promotion.  It seemed a logical step to make it to Frappy Hour all 10 days.  Quite proud to say I completed the challenge.  I dragged a few people with me on a few of those days, I am not above corrupting my friends.  It was fun and I enjoyed a few beverages that I would not have likely tried otherwise.  However, like coffee should not be decaffeinated, Frappuccinos should not be Non-Fat.  I am happy to go back to my Vanilla, Non-Fat Lattes. 

While on the subject of month long challenges, my friend Kaytee at work suggested my next challenge.  30 Dudes in 30 Days.  The question is: If I do this in July do I get a bonus Dude for the 31st or do I get a day off in there Somewhere?  Something tells me I would need the day off.  I have a feeling that even if I thought this challenge was possible the rules and exceptions would take the complication level beyond anything I could keep manageable.  Sorry Kaytee I'm going to have to pass on this one I think.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Why am I still up?

Oh yes, the Java Chip Frappuccino at 3:00PM and the Vanilla Latte at 6:00PM.  That would do it.  I have a feeling it is going to be a long day at work tomorrow.  I believe Friday is going to be a bit of a challenge as well but I'll cover that in another post if there is anything worth covering.  I will definitely be stopping at Starbucks in the morning on my way in.  I'll need something to get me through the morning.

A reasonably uneventful weekend.  Highlights would include a Bon Voyage party for Matt and Chris who are on their way to Iceland, France and Italy.  A very enjoyable time.  I also got to grab a drink with my sister who was in town judging a gymnastics competition.  She is in town for this fairly frequently but doesn't often get much down time so it was good that we managed to steal an hour to catch up a bit.  Mother will certainly be happy.

To any art fans who follow me, check out my friend Mack's new website.  Check out the gallery, Disconnect I and Disconnect II will be gracing my walls shortly.  I am lucky to have talented friends.  Much of the art in my place has been done by friends.  I am honoured to be able to display their work, be they professional artists like Mack or novice talents.  Thanks to all who have cotributed to my personal gallery, Richard, Tracy, Ryan, Rob, Calvin and Mack.  Thanks to Colin for thirty days of literature.  Thanks to Dan for getting me into art in the first place.  To all of you, I hope I have managed to give you back something in return for what you have given me.

And now, I shall make an attempt to sleep...

Friday, May 13, 2011

Another Blog All Together

So last time I mentioned getting int the habit...  I mentioned getting in the habit of writing again but more to the point of this entry getting in the habit of being active.  Running, biking, climbing and yoga to be more specific.

So here is the plan (stolen from a friend): Starting June 1st I am going to do one of the above activities every day for 30 days.  I plan on setting up an alternative blog but I warn you it will be short and dry, I do not anticipate any entries more in depth than a few lines confirming I got my ass out of my apartment and did something.

One final thing, I reserve the right to substitute activities from time to time.  Frankly, some days walking downtown to get my car after a drinking binge is going to be my activity.  I am at peace with this.

PS: I am told a good romp in the sheets could possibly be a substitute activity but I'll keep that as extra curriculars for bonus points.

Monday, May 9, 2011

The Dating Game

I had hoped to write this sooner.  I really just have to get back into the habit of writing.  I also need to get into the habit of running, biking, climbing and yoga.  Well that's another blog all together.

In my last entry I alluded to a shift in my thinking regarding dating.  After ending my last long term relationship I decided that I would wait at least a year before I would entertain the idea of dating.  I did break that briefly, I dated a great guy but knew early that he was not "the one" for me.  We continue to be friends and sometimes still go out on dates.  That was my favourite thing about my time with him, we had great dates.  Anyway, I digress...

A few weeks back I got to spend a Sunday afternoon with a young man who made me realize a few things.  I realized that there were things I was missing.  Not to brag but for some reason sex is not difficult for me to find.  So I have enjoyed the company of men from time to time and have enjoyed the physical contact.  What was missing was affection.  I did not realize I was missing it until this particular afternoon.  I have another friend with whom I have snuggled on the sofa to watch a movie and I always enjoyed it.  Perhaps it was my state of mind that Sunday but Colin gave me the proverbial kick in the ass that has put me in a state of mind that I like the idea of having someone in my life. 

Now don't go thinking that it was all that simple an epiphany.  I was actually pretty confused about it and about potential feelings for someone who was clearly not an appropriate candidate for me.  For someone as self-aware as I believe I am I have often been pretty confused about my feelings.  I have been known to fall for the idea of a person rather than the person themself.  In the end though I realized what was what.  I now have a more clear understanding of what I would like and am keeping an open mind to the possibilities.

Of one thing I am certain, I have made a new friend and I will enjoy and learn for whatever period of time our paths remain crossed, as I hope he will too. 

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Random Thoughts and Events...

Apparently I am short on both these days.

I realize that I generally get inspired by things I observe. I guess I have not been getting out as much since I bought the condo, hence not observing much.

Thoughts...

My good friend Robert pointed out that I have had lots to blog about but I have simply been respectful (for lack of a better word) enough not to. I have definitely had things to say but this forum is not appropriate for every thought I have or event I live through. I find that I have a clear view of the fact that every story is a matter of perspective. I do however think this is somewhat unique and don’t want to talk about some events in my life that refer to other people for fear of opinions being formed of those people. Opinions that do not take into account those people’s perspective.

Events...

I guess I have not talked too much about the condo. Not too many people buy property as an impulse purchase but that is exactly what happened to me. A friend at work mentioned the place, I looked it up on MLS and the next thing you know I was checking it out and putting in an offer.

So it is a small, bachelor unit. Not the downtown loft condo I would have liked but a nice little starter place. Definitely a quiet neighbourhood. I am fixing things up nicely, mostly decorating at this point. I have an eighty’s kitchen that will need to be replaced but that will likely be for next year. The bathroom is going to be a two phase renovation. Sink and vanity will be replaced shortly and the tiling and tub will be down the road. Right now I am working on the storage room. So glamorous. Also on the list; flooring, a bit more painting, a couple light fixtures, etc...

I do have some additional thoughts regarding a shift in my thinking regarding starting to date. A shift brought on by a new friend. I’ll save that for the next entry which I promise won’t be too long from now.